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Friday, 19 July 2019

The Not-So-Polite Observations of an Old Sour Grape


Hey there! If you are a blogger friend, I heartily congratulate you for having made it to The List. Non-bloggers (is there a muggle-like word for them?), it is a big thing to be on The List if you are a blogger. It is a comprehensive list, kinda like the Yellow Pages Awards for bloggers. Every blogger worth his words will be on The List. 


Every once in a while (probably every two months?), I am pleasantly surprised to see updates upon updates from delighted bloggers of having made it to The List. It is most likely that it is every blogger's dream to be acknowledged, to make a difference with words and thoughts that reach across the globe, enlightening, entertaining, healing the world with his/her prowess and knowledge.

I hasten to visit The Site, every time it comes up, and scroll down to the R's. R...Ra..tensing as I arrive at Re...nope, not there. Oh, yes, yours truly and blog are not on The List, as usual. Well, what did you expect, I say to myself. Writing whimsical stuff when it catches your fancy that caters to no one in particular, goes by a punchline that says, Always Expect the Unexpected, and you expect to be on The List? Pah! So not happening!
Are you even a blogger if you are not on The List, I ask myself. Yes, existential questions and self-doubt rack the mind. 

I casually wonder at the ingenuity of the person compiling The List. Smart guy/gal, this one. I hear listicle is a favorite blogging tool to help generate good SEO. (Look Ma, I am even learning to use some tech jargon in my blog)
This guy generates these listicles much like the honors list or the report cards one used to get in those harrowing wonder years. There are categories of these listicles, and pretty exhaustive lists these are. Besides the Top 25 Blogs, Top Travel Blogs, Top Food Blogs, Top Personal Blogs, there are other lists as well. Well-meaning, all-inclusive Lists like 1st, 2nd, 3rd consolation prizes, everyone gets to be on a List. In fact, it requires a special kind of talent to not make it to The List. Ahem! I surmise, I have not lost my touch in this aspect - consistently not making it to any list that matters.

The ones on The List definitely form the happening crowd of bloggers - some veteran reknown names, some consistent players, some newbie bloggers, some who've entered blogosphere from the happening Instagramland, to conquer this third-world SM realm. Yes, it does have the creme de la creme of bloggers. 
Blogging is much like Bollywood. You need to keep at it consistently. Be seen everywhere. Create controversies. Hob-nob with the hob-nobbable ones. Oh, yes generate content too.

And then I think...what if in the next Season of Listings, my blog makes it to The List? What then? Won't I be doing everything I could to tom-tom the breaking news, shouting it off roof-tops, nay, SM timelines? That ethereal moment in the limelight, however feeble its light, is what drives every being to chase his dream. Maybe I'd go that way too. 
Then again, I could demur! Be like the hoity-toity Amir Khan type or the award-waapsi type, and not do it very quietly either. I'd head to the SM and nonchalantly disclaim my claim to fame - that should make for some desirable noise - ruffling feathers.

Speaking of ruffling feathers, I think this post is certainly going to make inroads on that aspect.
Meh! I am just a good ol' sour grape! 



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Copyright © 2019 KALA RAVI

Comments (41)

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Modern Gypsy 's avatar

Modern Gypsy · 300 weeks ago

hahaha! You had me in splits, Kala! There are so many lists, it’s impossible to even keep track of them or figure out which ones are even really relevant. At the end of the day, most of them work by pestering everyone you to vote for you. So not worth it, IMHO!
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Divyakshi Gupta's avatar

Divyakshi Gupta · 300 weeks ago

Sooo happy to read a quintessential Kala post after so long! Yayy! I was snorting, sniggering, laughing, chuckling all through. Such a delightful sarcasm this is:) Instagramland bloggers are the worst thing that happened to the good old Blogosphere! And lists! Sigh... the recycled, outdated, cut copy pasted lists! The lesser said the better :)
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
I have never made it to that particular list ;) I don't even know how to get on that list. :D

Also, as of 2017 end, I decided to steer clear of all blogging contests, for purely personal reasons. And this was hilarious to read :D
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
I am with you on this, K. I too share your special talent for not making to those lists. After all, there are no awards for being whimsical and inconsistent! I was nodding through your post smiling to myself all through. 😁
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Kokila Gupta's avatar

Kokila Gupta · 300 weeks ago

Aha! 😁😁
As I don't blog or 'connect' and just write whenever I can squeeze out time, I found this sour grape quite sweet! 😊😊
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Oh I am veteran at it, Kala. Never made it to any list, not picked by any 'in' website to feature my post, nor, nor....But you have miles to go and who knows you will be at the top of some fundoo list this year. Don't forget to send some peda when you do. I just can't have enough of peda, the Dharwad variety, especially. Slurp!
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Oh, Kala. Love you for writing this! And I feel you. Really! :D I never made it to The list even after seven years of blogging. Initially, yes, i confess, that I was sad thinking why i was not in the coveted revered list when i know all Tom, Dick and Harry were making it. But now, I'm like meh! Whatever! :)
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Hehe Kala. You had me in splits. I have to say that there are so many lists, it's difficult to keep track of them. Not to mention awards. Every person is starting their own award. Chalo theek hai! And then magazine features on magazines no one has heard of! As a dutiful blogger, I congratulate the person because they are happy. Else like so much else in blogging, these are unregulated too. I loved your humour in this one.
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Nabanita Dhar's avatar

Nabanita Dhar · 300 weeks ago

Hehehe...I love this post and I love you for writing this. There is one list which I am part of but other then that I never make it to any list 🙈 I loved your humour!
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
I might have written this post myself, but for my lazy ass. I'm doubly pleased, therefore, that you have spared me the trouble.

I've been blogging for 12 years now, 9 of them on Serenely Rapt. And never, not once, have I made it to ANY list. I will not deny that it irked me big time once upon a time. But like you, I've made my peace with it.

It would have been wonderful if I had made it to the list (oh did your sensitive ears catch the lower-case there? Niceee!), but it is also nice that I haven't. I've had to learn to supply me with my own accolades--always a fine talent to have in your arsenal. Right?
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Ha ha! This one had me smiling and at times giggling. I’m in the yellow pages but no where else. I’m found on a lot of lazy places but not on The List.
This was a great read! Thoroughly enjoyed!
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Now, how many bloggers can write a post like that, dipped generously in sarcasm and humour, and still not sound resentful and nasty? Not many, Kala! You are one amazing blogger and for many of us, you are one of the finest writers in the blogosphere so which list are we talking of and who needs to certify you... you are one of the best. Period! The people on those lists will vouch for that! 😊
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
T F Carthick's avatar

T F Carthick · 300 weeks ago

I know which list. I remember this list from long back. When it initially came up, even bloggers who were selected were like "Who the hell are you to sit in judgement over me and certify me. Am I supposed to jump in joy for having made it to your crummy list.' From there over the years, it moved to people flaunting the position proudly in their blogs. Now its become like a big achievement to make it to the list. I have seen all phases. I have not made it to the list in the initial years. Then I have had both my blogs feature there. Then one blog. last 2-3 years neither. You don't know what happens behind the scenes. A few they identify but many would have self nominated. If you are blogging regularly, only reason you are not on the list is because you didn't drop them a note to include you.
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
This year I made it to the list to my surprise. But nothing changed because of that. So after feeling sour for the last 5 years consistently I learned that lists are not important in anyway other than “how you question the not making it to the list “ to ruin your precious blog’s sanity and yours by extension. I decided to accept the trivial-ness of all things materialistic and move on with my life next time I see a list or an award without my name in it. Of course, if it does contain my name I will be shouting from the rooftop and do a happy dance. 😀😀
You are ver humorous (which you knew already) and a talented writer, Kala. It will be an honor to be featured in a list along with you. ❤️
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Glad to see you back in action . Will probably make it to the List now that you’ve woken from your break. Missed your witty take on life and enjoyed reading this post.
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
Hahaha oh Kala this was hilarious. Loved the way you wrote this witty and sarcasm filled post. Trust me, the list does nothing to your blog. Doesn't bring traffic, no new blog readers. I never get featured by magazines or win any award. Plus this whole SEO thing makes me write weird sentences. Google hasn't showered much love to my blog yet. A decade and I still feel like a newbie in blogosphere 😅😅
1 reply · active 300 weeks ago
The good old days. When i use to get so excited getting a email oh my blog is in that list .. or in ths top 20 blah blah blah.. you are right aout hob nobbing.. blogging is more of scratc my bck i scratch yours.. you comment on mine i wll comment on yours.

Same with followers..

I wonder what i need to do to mke it to one of the lists now.. well to start with i need to start writing.
I thought i just make the list without writing
Thanks for sharing your thoughts Mann! Name, fame is all transient. Finally one has to do something for the love of it, that's all! Hope you get back into the writing mode soon!
I don't know which particular list you are talking about. I routinely make it to some and don't make it to most others. And have never figured out why or why not. But either way I have realized most (if not all) of them honestly mean nothing. So dear lady, you are really missing nothing. But I think you already know that. :)

That being said, this post was HILARIOUS. :D
Ha ha ha... this was hilarious. although I have no clue which list you're talking about but really, there are too many of them. I generally don't get onto most of them and I don't much mind sitting in my corner and blogging away quietly. So you're got company :-).
You've spoken for a lot of Bloggers, Kala;))))))
Also, which list is this? I am featured in a few and always announce it from rooftops! You've also congratulated me on some !;))))
I swear that some of the bloggers who are acting all nonchalant in the comments, , I have seen them announcing it everywhere but on tv!
This was a truly insightful post, :))))) and of course hilarious and brilliantly written too!
Hahaha! This was such a fun read, Kala. I have been featuring in this list since its inception, but it's actually a directory of active blogs and nothing else. So, I have never shared about it anywhere. I find it actually very funny when I see people announcing about making it to the LIST on all social media platforms. Let me tell you that you dont need it!! :D
Kartik Kumar's avatar

Kartik Kumar · 292 weeks ago

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Miracle Tool's avatar

Miracle Tool · 266 weeks ago

Good one

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